Why?

I have had always a special liking for the word, ‘why?’ as a child I would always ask ‘why’ to my parents, teachers and neighbours. My ‘why(s)’ would focus on knowing something new or to get clarified on certain issues. My mother sometimes would get angry with me and would tell me to concentrate on studies. The person who would try to answer my ‘why(s)’ was my aunty, who was a nun. Whenever she would come home, I would always stay close to her and put forward all my why(s). Then over the years I found many people, who would listen to me. I was fortunate enough to live with some great intellectual Jesuits, who would eagerly response to my why(s).
I do ask even now ‘why’. But strangely things have changed. These days often I do not ask others. I ask to myself. I often wonder. There are many times I do not get any answer. Sometimes I ask to myself, why do I like to talk with some particular people, or why I enjoy the company of certain people, or why I like to go certain places, or why do certain people behave in a particular way…and the list is endless!

Of course, recently the one, who is becoming victim of my why(s) is God. I often ask God ‘why’? Each time I am faced with a problem I ask God ‘why’. When I see sufferings of the people I ask God ‘why’. I do not blame God for all the misfortunes. I find God in the midst of the sufferings. I see him suffering with me or with us silently. This brings me close to God. Perhaps this could be in tune with the saying of St Ignatius, “finding God in everything.”



These ‘whys’ are helping me to see the different aspects of life. I know there are many whys which have no instant answers. I have to keep on moving forward. Along the way I might get the reply of my why(s)! (As I was about to put an end, I asked myself, why did I write on this topic today? Why…)