How big is my God!

These days often I ask myself, “How big is my God?”

Being in Rome, I am fortunate enough to see the ‘BIG’ places of God. There are hundreds of Churches, lots of holy places related to saints and the tombs of saints and their relics are to be found in every corner of Rome. The priests, religious men and women are very much visible in the streets of Rome. All these places and people are supposed to manifest God. But do we really find God?

The spirituality, which I try to follow, is Ignatian Spirituality. My knowledge of Ignatian spirituality is very limited. But one sentence of St Ignatius, “finding God in everything” always keeps me down to earth. Sometimes I make God BIG and sometimes I make very small. Every task I perform, every word I utter, every moment I spend with others show how BIG or small is my God.

There is a growing tendency to make God small. We are comfortable to make ourselves BIG. Thus we make everything external BIG. This gives us identity. But our true identity God often remains small.

As I often ask myself, how big is my God!, I also wish if I could make my God BIG!

Easter Sunday: New Hope, New life!

One of the inspiriting homilies I have ever heard was when I was in Calcutta, doing college studies. It was the time when I was having some difficulties with regard to my admission. I had by then completed two years and was remaining just one more year to finish my graduation. Just before writing my final exams of two years, I was told by the university authority that my admission was not accepted due to year gap. After completing class XII, I joined the Jesuits and spent four years in different formation houses. This gap led me to this difficulty. It was a complete chaotic situation. My Jesuit Superior came with me to the university and he was told my admission would not be accepted. My Superior asked me to wait; meanwhile he was trying to do something!

It was just after Easter. A visiting Jesuit priest from a rural mission station was staying with us just for a few days. One day he was asked to offer Mass for us. He began his homily by saying that we were Easter people. Jesus gave us new life with his resurrection. Why should we be worried about our life! Jesus is our life. Then he shared his life story, how his life experience has taught him. As he was speaking I could feel that he was convinced of what he was preaching. He did not utter any theological jargon. By the end of the Mass I was already feeling a sense of peace and serenity. That was the first time I was convinced that we are Easter people.

Every year around Easter, I remember this inspiring sermon. Another Easter is at our door. For the last couple hours I have been receiving Easter greetings. To my great surprise, I noticed that most of the messages are with a simple of message of ‘New Hope and New life!’

Wishing you all a blessed Easter and of course New Hope and New life…

Good Friday and…!

And then another Good Friday is at our door! That means ‘Jesus is dead!’ The simple question which kept on lingering with me for the last few days is- Jesus why did you die! The Holy Bible says, he died for our salvation and to fulfil the plan of his Father. Many great theologians, spiritual gurus say that he did so that we have a new life.

I tried to answer this question. There were many responses! Many thoughts! But the only answer which convinced me is that he died for each one of us. He died for me. He did so because he loved us all. He still loves us… He does not remain a dead man when we are aware of this love. He himself becomes a love. We are all invited to partake in this love. This is the message that Good Friday brings to us…

HE has a plan!

For the last couple of weeks I have been sick. It does not mean that I am bed ridden. There was no external sign. I have been doing everything normally as I was doing before. I met our house doctor several times but he seems to be taking very lightly. He neither examined my body nor did he ask me to do any x-ray. As my situation was becoming worse my Superior asked me to meet the doctor for the last time and then we would go to another doctor. With a heavy mind I went to meet the doctor. To my great surprise there was a different doctor. He came on a replacement. He was so kind to me. He gave a patient hearing to my problem. He also suggested the further course of action. As I was coming out of the doctor’s chamber I thought of meeting a person who resides just next door. Not sure of knowing where he was, I called him. He was in his room and asked me to come to his room. I went to his room and to my great surprise I found he had just returned from the hospital. He was admitted in the hospital and had an operation. I spent sometimes with him.

Offering God...

Yes my devotion to my books has increased rapidly. The books I read are all about the Bible, theology, church, liturgy…and about God! As I browse through the pages of my notes I ask myself, ‘can I really study God?’ I have no answer. All I know is that I can have the experience of God and in fact I am doing it. As St Ignatius puts it, “finding God in everything…” how true these words are… my struggles, my fear, my tension, my weaknesses, my shortcomings, my success, my temptations, my studies, my parents, my friends, my books, my room, my religious life, my three vows…God is there in everything! I offer them all to you…

At Easter: my thought…

At Easter: my thought…


Years ago, sometimes immediately after Easter, when I was doing my college studies in Calcutta, a Jesuit priest offered Holy Mass in our community. He was a pastor working among the tribal people. The simple but profound homily he preached for us touched my heart. The few sentences he spoke would be as follows: ‘I experience Risen Christ among the people with whom I work. They are poor, illiterate and in our modern sense uncivilized. They do not have many needs. They work hard, spend all the earnings in eating and drinking, respect each other and faithfully follow all the Church’s teachings. When they have any problem they come to me and ask for solution. Often I do not have any solution to their problems. Sometimes I take them to the Church, show them the Crucifixion and tell them that Jesus died for us because He loved us. But his life story is not ended with his death. He overcame the death to give us new life. If we believe in his resurrection we will have new life and he will look after all our needs. Theses simple often believe my words. They surrender their problems at the feet of Jesus. Some of them do come back to me after few days to thank me for the blessing and prayer.

I found the words very profound and up-lifting. Many years have gone by since I heard those words. But surprisingly every year at the time of Easter I remember these words. In my own life, when things are not in order, when I do not find the solution of many problems I remember those words of the holy priest. I look at the Risen Lord and draw inspiration for him.

What about you?